How can I help my younger sister (middle kid - 3 girls) quit smoking weed - it's making her SO unmotivated!

Our beloved Mother was killed in a car accident when she was 11. Myself (16 at the time) and my baby sister (9 at the time) have turned out well, finishing school, etc. I've worked at a Big 4 accounting firm. My middle sister had no motivation to start with -- AND she's been smoking weed, drinking, has even taken cocaine, etc. -- and I know that makes you even MORE unmotivated! Dad is an alcholic. Our immediate and extended family has more than enough resources to send her to school but she does not even want to learn to do nails or anything -- it's not like she NEEDS a 4 year degree etc. or grad school etc. I've been buying books at Barnes and Noble (What color is your parachute?, Do What you Are, Resumes that Knock Em Dead, 300 Best Jobs without a 4-year Degree, and even a Joyce Meyer book) -- but I doubt she'll even OPEN it! What is wrong with her! My baby sister and I just want to shake her and say "What is wrong with you?!" I am religious so I pray but what else can I do please?

Asked By: Mishy - 5/16/2006
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
There's really very little that you can do if your sister is an adult. You cannot do the work for her. She is going to have to want to change it herself, and that may or may not happen. The only thing you can do is have her involuntarily signed into rehab. Talk to a lawyer in your area to find out if that is an option... More
Answered By: music_girl - 5/16/2006
Additional Answers (14)
it sounds like she needs to go to a treatment program. i'm pretty sure that she's not going to listen to anything you say at this point. she needs a wakeup call. maybe an intervention and a trip to a facility will help her out.
Answered By: - 5/16/2006
Call the police after some time behind bars she should be clean and straight.
Answered By: thissith - 5/16/2006
It looks like you need to gather your extended family and have an intervention. She's obviously depressed and is looking for a way to stop the pain she feels inside. Look into sending her to a rehab facility.
Answered By: snapszen - 5/16/2006
Thats so sad and im very sorry for you, i think you should sit down with her and talk to her about how much people love her and how bad it is to do drugs,and if she still does drugs you should get her help.
Answered By: hscott - 5/16/2006
Sounds kind of like me. Some of us are just not meant for this world, it is hard to live knowing people look at you as a failure. Makes it impossible to believe in yourself.
Answered By: aouija - 5/16/2006
Offer to baby-sit, prepare meals, or do other favors to help reduce stress for the other person... More
Answered By: Ann A - 5/16/2006
You can't make her do anything. Some people like the attention they get when they destroy themselves. Tell her you are done trying to fix her and that it is her responsibility to make her life better for herself. Tell her you love her and wish she loved herself enough to try to make herself better. Tell her you'll be... More
Answered By: C D - 5/16/2006
I feel for you, but maybe she'll just shake herself down by herself when the time is right.
Answered By: mesun1408 - 5/16/2006
Do just that! Shake her and say "What is wrong with you?!" Make her see that you love her and care about her (not about her being successful and stuff like that) but that you actually care about her as a person. Also, of course keep praying sister if you are truly "religious" and I mean a true believer your prayers... More
Answered By: jbirdy2007 - 5/16/2006
Have a talk between the three of you and try to get her into rehab and going to a shrink. Maybe they can find out what is going on in her mind, and when you find out what´s her problem then you can face it... More
Answered By: camp1971 - 5/16/2006
Try to change her enviroment, make her start a new everything. New enviroment means new friends, new lifestyle and new everything. Don't stop praying because this will help. Make her realize that she is on a wrong direction, motivate or do anything that will make her realize that life without drugs is so d**n beautiful... More
Answered By: aznkristian - 5/16/2006
There is hope for her. I used to use all sorts of drugs back when I was about 15. I did more things than I can name including cocaine and once I even tryed crystal meth. I'm 18 now. I graduated high school a year early with a 4.0 and am currently working on 3 bachelors degrees. I will then work on a PhD in one of them... More
Answered By: jellybean - 5/16/2006
Can you encourage her to smoke cigarettes, she wont suffer from the motivation issues you have described. Tell her you love her, but you dont like the drugs she is on , but you would accept her to smoke cigarettes. If you tried pushing her into giving up everything cold turkey, then she would be say she has to do... More
Answered By: blacksheep557 - 5/19/2006
Until your sister sees for herself what she is doing not only to herself but to her family as well,the only thing you can do is attend Ala-non.(Check with your local AA organization for the location nearest you... More
Answered By: Just Q - 5/22/2006
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