Dad, let him live HIS life, not yours! He's brilliant, don't mess with it. You can even maybe take some credit for that. It's a lot easier to fix computers than it is to fix people. And more profitable. And provides a normal life with the chance at some happiness. I work with doctors all day, and they are some of the unhappiest people I know. Success does not equal happiness. He needs to find his one true path. Take a deep breath... and let go.
Answered By: nursemom - 5/2/2007 |
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Let him do what he wants to do!
god dont try and force him into a career if i was him (no offence) i would move out. its his life not yours!!
AH you make me angry
Answered By: *ellie * - 5/1/2007 |
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When it comes down to it, it is your son's choice as to what he wants to do with his life. As long as he's not harming himself or anyone else or doing anything illegal your best option would be to encourage him. My brother is a computer programmer and has been in the field for 20+ years. He loves it and that's all there is to it. I couldn't talk him out of it if I tried. He has wanted me to join him in that profession but to me it's boring and that's my opinion. I'm in the education field and plan to stay there. If your son does not want to be a doctor, you can't force him to do something that he doesn't want to do. Consider this--Do you want him to fulfill your dreams or his own?
Answered By: gottaspider - 4/30/2007 |
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Hey hes your kid if you want to ruin his life forever and make him totally dispise you then force him do be a doc, I f you want him to love you then let him be a comp programer. and yea you are tryin to be in his way, don't make your kids become something that you wanted to be but didn't make it.
Why do some people think the only successful careers ar doctors or lawyers?
Answered By: newbie ice hockey fan & TV serie - 4/30/2007 |
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Tell him to take up medicine and then when he becomes a really rich successful doctor , he can take up computer programming as a second course .....
Answered By: person - 4/30/2007 |
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How can your 15 year old son keep you from micromanaging his life? If you truly want him to be successful, he will be most successful doing something that he is gifted in and enjoys. It sounds like your trying to live out your shortcomings through your son. Back off and give him the support he needs to pursue HIS career and HIS life. I think you have some issues that you made to take a close look at. Why are you so hung up on him becoming a doctor? So you can brag about him? Money? If you answer this question honestly, I think you would find some selfish motivation.
Answered By: l00k_up - 4/30/2007 |
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Who's life do you expect him to live? His life or your life?
Would you rather him be a miserable doctor or a happy programmer? He will be successful at anything that makes him happy.
Answered By: Penny A - 4/29/2007 |
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Sounds VERY much to me like you are trying to get in his way. I am a parent. I have been parented. I have observed other parents. The LEAST effective parent is the one who is forceful with what they want their children to be, instead of encouraging them to pursue the career that they have a passion for. I mean, you are acting as if he wants to be a pimp or a drug dealer! He wants to be a computer programmer, and by your own admission, "the games he has created...are AMAZING!" Doesn't that say something about his potential? What kind of doctor would he end up being if that is not his passion? He has been blessed with the mind for computer programming and you are, by your pushing him to be a doctor, squashing that. That is not effective parenting.
Answered By: CuteSexyThickMama - 4/29/2007 |
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If your son enjoys computer programming, that's what he should do! You don't want him to be miserable, do you? Maybe he will be a successful computer programmer. Did your parents push you into becoming something you didn't want to be? Besides, if he's 15, he might change his mind before going to college. And, medical school is pretty exspensive, so you might save yourself a little $$.
Answered By: Elliot L - 4/29/2007 |
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HONEY ... in that field he can make more money then a doctor.... you should feel blessed that your child even knows what he wants to do.. let him be him... he will be a lot happier
and if he goes to a college..... he will come out cheaper and less in debit then he would in med school.
some of those doctors come out of school 50-60-70-80 thousand dollars in debit... let him be...
Answered By: panda - 4/29/2007 |
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Just be grateful your son wants to do something with his life and allow him to choose the job that makes him happy. What a parent wants for their children is all done with the best of intentions but we have to let go and let God do what he wants in each of our kids. Maybe it's your sons calling in life to be a computer programmer. I sure hope he works hard in college and accomplishes his dream. God will help him if you will allow him to.
Answered By: kingskid1961 - 4/29/2007 |
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Wouldn't you rather he be happy? If he wants to be a computer programmer then let him. You can't live through your children, you need to let him be his own person. Doctors work long hours and many rarely see their families. Computer programmers make good money and can get jobs that are 40 hours a week.
You need to let him make his own decisions for the future, you don't want him to resent you for pushing him into a career he will hate.
Answered By: roxiecat4200 - 4/29/2007 |
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Don't try to stop him is my advice. I think that he should stick with what he loves. They have universities, and technical instituets, for computer programmers, and game desginers. Don't try to stop him or force him into anything that he doesn't want to do, or he WILL rebel, and he might resent you. If his games are as good as you say, then he will probably do well as computer programmer or game designer.
Answered By: Lauren P - 4/29/2007 |
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Let your son be what he wants to be both of you need to watch jump in on disney channel and high school musical and teaches peple to let people be who they wanna be not their parents dream
Answered By: official aj montana - 4/29/2007 |
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Well its his life he can do what he want. and you can be succesful with that job! my brother in law works with computers and hes doing great!
Answered By: MATT N - 4/29/2007 |
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It is up to him to decide what he wants to do for the rest of his life. Did your parents tell you what to do? Your telling him to become a doctor, that's not what he wants. It's your son's decision not yours. Besides he's only 15, when he goes to college he will probably end up changing his major like more than half of college students. I have two daughters that have graduated from college, and a 15 year old now who has a 3.9 gpa. She has changed her mind 10 times already, but it's not my decision to tell her what to do with her life, yes, I want her to do well but I also want her to be Happy with Her choice.
Answered By: darcy r - 4/29/2007 |
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That is a huge mistake--You have to learn that you cannont live your child's life. Most people want their children to be happy and successful--meaning their meaning of happiness and success--NOT YOURS! I would rather my child to be a happy, successful computer programmer instead of a mediocre, unhappy physician-- It is selfish of you to even consider anything else. Besides, what's the big idea, at least he has goal and it's not like he said he wants to be a drug dealer.
Answered By: Joi J - 4/29/2007 |
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Leet him be what he wants to be. its his life not yours.
Answered By: dancingducky123 - 4/29/2007 |
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If hes good at being a computer programer, he will probably be sucessful in life doing that
Answered By: a random 13 year old girl - 4/29/2007 |
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Back off! let him do what he wants to do. imaginge if your parents tried to make you loose your dream job. if he is good at it let him do it, he will be able to support himself and be happy. what's wrong with that and why are you trying to interfere is my question
Answered By: Beautifulbrunette123 - 4/29/2007 |
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You do realise that computer programmers earn a very good salary, maybe not as good as doctors do, however its still a very good income. My mum wanted me to be a computer programmer however I said no as I despise maths, and being a computer programmer, it is necessary to be good in math and enjoy it, which I wouldn’t. Furthermore the studying period to become a computer programmer is delightfully shorter than a doctor and considering the amount of work you do the pay is better. For example vets compared to nurses earn a total of 55 thousand a year before tax, HOWEVER they work 52 (I think its 52 or something) hours a week! That is way more hours than a nurse works ( in a week a vet nurse works 36 hours) and THEY earn 52 thousand a year ( gradually more by experience), how unfair is that! What’s more disturbing is that a vet is a doctor the only difference is that a vet is a doctor for animals and not humans, and a nurse isn’t anything close to a doctor and they earn almost the same salary! So now a vet nurse, they are lucky to earn 30 thousand a year before tax after 3 to 4 years of study, that is how much you would earn in a factory PLUS you don’t have to do any studying. Consequently a vet nurse is payed nothing remotely close to a human nurse and a doctors are underpaid too.
Wow now that I’m done talking my head off, I hope I haven’t lost you. I guess my advice is let your son choose his career, he will be much happier is he does.
Answered By: Lisa L - 4/29/2007 |
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I completly agree with everyone, it is his life, let him decide. I also think you should stop worrying. Most kids change what they want to be at least 5 times in school before they go away to college. I personally wanted to be a nurse up until my summer before senior year, then I did an internship at a college and decided it wasn't for me. I'm now a year away from becoming a teacher. If you want him to be happy, allow him to explore his options. Give him a chance to go to a programing class at night (if your area has such programs, if not sign him up for one online). Also about colleges and universities. If he wants to start small let him. I was so burned out after HS that I was very glad that i only had to go to a jr college instead of a university. It would of cost more money and would of put a lot of pressure on me. If you really are set on such a thing, make a deal with him (espesially if you are paying for it). Allow him to go to the smaller school for the first two years, then when he is positive what he is going to major in, transfer him to the best university that has that program. He will be grateful to you for trying to see it his way. Just don't pressure him too much, or he will block you out of his life and wont listen to ANY of your suggestions. Good luck!
Answered By: ayla_2114 - 4/29/2007 |
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My son is just finishing his degree in computer programing. I know he will be successful and happy. My son is an intern at a local Internet service company and is making $17.00 and hour and it is his first real job. Not what doctors make, but definitely a livable wage. Be happy your son has a goal, but show him his goal will require him to get more schooling. Have him look at the link I provided about his expected income and schooling he will need. It shows the medium salary is over $30.00 and hour.
Answered By: fourtsomething - 4/29/2007 |
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If that's what he enjoys and he makes great games then let him. he'll probably be just as successful and much happier. if that's what he's dead set on doing it will be pretty hard to change his mind anyway
Answered By: xangel123x - 4/29/2007 |
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Computer programmers are extremely successful! Just look at Bill Gates.................
This is your son's life choice - NOT yours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Be proud of him no matter which career path he takes!!!!!!!!
Answered By: Linda D - 4/29/2007 |
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Let him do what he wants to do!! its not YOUR LIFE ITS HIS!!!
Answered By: karen - 4/29/2007 |
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Just let him do what he wants. It's up to him what he wants to do for a living, not you.
Answered By: Toxicity² - 4/29/2007 |
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If he's good at what's he enjoys--let go! Let him be what HE wants to be! Maybe he isn't a serious people person and/or doesn't like to deal with health. Let him find his own way so he'll be happy his whole life.
Answered By: Liz - 4/29/2007 |
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I feel bad for your son! Let him do whatever he wants to do and leave him alone!
Answered By: lostsoul - 4/29/2007 |
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He can certainly be successful in life being a computer programmer. For one thing, if he enjoys it and is willing to work within a suitable corporate culture, he can do very well pay-wise, and he will get a lot of recognition for his work. By accumulating experience, he will always be employable - which is no small thing.
Yes, doctor is nice. But a great programmer will do much better than a mediocre doctor, and at half the cost of educating.
Could he please you by doing biomedical programming?
Answered By: kathyw - 4/29/2007 |
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Let him do what he wants and stop trying to control his life.
Answered By: LL - 4/29/2007 |
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Computer programmers are successful. However be sure to tell him that he can lose his job in 30 years and that he will need to keep going to college to update his experiences and that most computer programmers lose their jobs to younger men and women out of college.
Answered By: ayisha b - 4/29/2007 |
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Think he will be a better programmer
being a docotr is about killing people.
Yes many times you will fail to save somones life or have to make major decisions and make mistakes.... plus all the blood, nastiness that goes with it etc.
Maybe he may get involved in designing something for doctos say in robotics or hi tech surgery
he night not be cut out for that
Answered By: Informerdude - 4/29/2007 |
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What planet are you living on? Computers are the future! Almost everything has a computer attached to it.
Ok lets try it this way. So he becomes a Dr. he is not happy because he is not doing what he loves. So he isn't properly educated because he didn't try in college because it was boring and then he messes up some persons body and gets sued for every thing he has.
Or he becomes a programmer, lives a happy full life with a huge house and one day he creates this game that the entire planet loves and makes millions of dollars and buys you what ever you want for helping him be what he is today.
I would give anything to be making a living doing something I love. Don't crush his dream, at least he is not trying to do something unrealistic! What he wants to do is some thing that he will have a future with. He could even create a medical machine that could help save lives one day. He sounds like a smart kid. Trust in him......
Answered By: mntnck - 4/29/2007 |
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Sounds like you are trying to live your life thru him.
Why weren't you the doctor ? ?
Computer programers are in big demand.
Let your child be happy with what he does best !
Grow up !
Answered By: I XLR-8 - 4/29/2007 |
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Stop telling your son what to be, let him be whatever makes him happy.
Besides doctors make less than software engineers on some cases or what you refer to as computer programmers.
The richest man in the world is a computer programmer... now quit being an obnoxious bit** to your son and let him be whatever he wants.
Answered By: R2_ - 4/29/2007 |
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I would let him be the programmer. as fast as technology is advancing, someday, maybe soon, it will be a computer that does the surgery, so he can be both.
Answered By: Kev M - 4/28/2007 |
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Answered By: Sincere1 - 4/28/2007 |
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Surely he has to do what he wants to do (within reason) because his passion for computers will make him successful regardless of anything else. You admit yourself that his work is amazing.
A dotor's training is long and hard and he will really have to want to become a doctor in order to succeed. You can't force him to do something he doesn't like.
Can't you take more interest in what he wants to do and help and guide him along that career path instead?
He can still go to university and pursue a career as a programmer and this is an area where the two of you should probably compromise.
Answered By: happy - 4/28/2007 |
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U should let him be an computer programmer which he likes to be and enjoys it then a doctor in which he is not interested at all . to support this even u admit the games he has created on his visual basic program are amazing. being a parent everyone want their ward to be successful in life but one cannot be successful unless he enjoys what he does and Ur son enjoys in being a computer programmer.
Answered By: D-factor works - 4/28/2007 |
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Stop right now. It's his life, and if that's what he enjoys doing, let him do it. Pressuring him into something he does not care about is not doing anyone any good at all.
Answered By: ncjay08 - 4/28/2007 |
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You are in his way. You should back off he is 15 yrs old and at least he wants to do something with his own life. You get a life now and stop making decision for him. He will be a better man and a computer programmer too. It is his choice try to be supportive he could be doing a whole lot of other things wrong. God bless you and yours.
Answered By: dmvariety - 4/28/2007 |
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You want him to be succesful in life... in the way you define 'succesful'.
I think your idea is very bad.
Think about it: Suppose you 'win' and he goes to a medical university.
How is he going to keep motivated for the 10 years that it takes to become a doctor?
You may win once, but if it's not his own idea, he's going to lose out against all the other students who really ARE motivated for the whole duration of the course.
Answered By: mgerben - 4/28/2007 |
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The fact that he is 15 and knows what he wants to do is great. You can't live his life. He will through it up in your face. Why don't you become a doctor?
Answered By: Cathy F - 4/28/2007 |
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Well, I am trying to figure out why you think he would not be successful as a Computer Programmer. My husband is a software engineer and is VERY successful. We live a very comfortable life. I think you are being FAR too pushy and need to step back and allow him to make his own decisions. As a mother all I want for my children is for them to be happy.
Answered By: bauersfamily - 4/28/2007 |
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