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Please don't judge. What if you love but no longer like your own kid? I feel like a bad parent.?

My 16yr old was a nice kid. I'd sit w him late at night doing HW until I put him in private school for kids w learning disabilities. He was doing well until 8th grade were he just started bieng a total delinquent:he lies,steals, cusses his 2 younger sibs & more.Things get worse annually & he is in a school for kids w social problems (mostly autism). I have increased his thearapy time but he still throws vilolent screaming, crying tantrums (he is 6'2). He runs away when I try to ground him. I stopped spanking him around 14 years when he called the police on me. I'm scarred he is going to hurt his10 year old sis cause he says he wishes she were dead. He says I treat her and my middle son(13) like they are better and smarter. I so love my 1st born, but I dislike him. I now it's sounds crazy but my house is peacful until he wakes or comes home from school.He is spiteful, winy,never listens & talks non stop.The siblings & hubby r traumatized by the daily fights. I feel like running away! For Mama Carrie; the father and I have recently seperated. I was giving a summary of activity over the years.

Asked By: slimms - 8/28/2007
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
I've been there, even the police part. My son has PDD which is on the more functional spectrum of autistic disorders. We sent him to Children's Hospital in Dallas for 6 weeks (8 years ago) for them to test him, train him, and figure out what meds would work best with his diagnosis (ADD/PDD/bipolar). It's been a lot... More
Answered By: Debbie V - 8/28/2007
Additional Answers (25)
PSH and people said public schools where bad influeces... mii culo -.-
Answered By: Bekky - 8/28/2007
 
Talk to his counselors at his school. I'm sure they deal with this all the time and they can either help you or recommend where to get help. I'm sorry for you and hope you get the help you and your family needs.
Answered By: Precious - 8/28/2007
 
It's a phase most parents go though in life you will get passed it, be patient
Answered By: A***n G - 8/28/2007
 
We dont always LIKE our children, we just haev to rememebr to keep on LOVING them. Same goes for our spouses, parents, siblings....etc etc. They arent always one in the same. I have a 13 year old so I KNOW!!
Answered By: Betsy - 8/28/2007
 
THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU!! You love your kids, you don't always have to like them. But feel confident that he will probably grow up (mature) and you can again have a healthy relationship.
Answered By: LaraLouLa - 8/28/2007
 
I think that you and your son needs to go to therapy. No you are not a bad parent for feeling like that.
Answered By: Marla - 8/28/2007
 
wow i dont know what to say im sorry. your not a bad parent im sure u still love him somewere inside of you. maybe he will never chagne and leave ur house and u can go visit himwhen he gets older
Answered By: danielaa - 8/28/2007
 
in another question you said you were a single mom. which is it?
Answered By: Mama Carrie - 8/28/2007
 
Maybe you should see a therapist. You have a lot to deal with and you should go through it alone. They can help you cope with your situation and maybe get a better bond with your son.
Answered By: Krystal S - 8/28/2007
 
Is he on medication? Does he need to be on medication? Does his medication need to be changed? It sounds as if you have your hands full. Can you talk to someone at his school to see what they suggest?
Answered By: Noah's Mommy - 8/28/2007
 
You obviously have a parenting problem. I can't help you. I really don't understand wht there is no mention of a psychiattrist for you...and your kid.
Answered By: chrispkreme333 - 8/28/2007
 
well i don't have an answer for you but perhaps he feels alone cause he is the only one going to a special school for special kids, maybe it makes him feel inadequate. If you really are scared for your younger children turn him over to the state and let them handle him.
Answered By: Wishmaster - 8/28/2007
 
AUTISIM IS A HARD DISFUNCTION TO DEAL WITH ESPECIALLY WITH SIBS. HAVE YOU THOUGHT OF A HOME FOR YOUR SON WHERE YOU CAN STILL SEE HIM HE SOUNDS DANGEROUS TO YOUR DAUGHTER.SORRY SOUNDS HARSH BUT I DEAL WITH AUTISIM & VIOLENT THREATS ARE A BAD SIGN
Answered By: serinity_rose76 - 8/28/2007
 
I think what you are feeling is normal for a parent raising a troubled child. It's not that you don't like HIM. You love him, you just don't like some of his behavior. Maybe the two of you could go to counseling together. See if you can work out some of the communication barriers that are keeping you from having a... More
Answered By: Becky - 8/28/2007
 
i drive for a school and do work between my runs for a school like ur describing dont feel like a bad parent its hard to deal with children like that i dont have one but im around them more than i am my own children keep ur head up n be there for them no matter what and if u feel ur other children r in danger there... More
Answered By: paper doll - 8/28/2007
 
It's not crazy at all. I've told my kids on a few occasions when they were acting up that I love them, but I didn't like them very much at that moment. They understand the difference... More
Answered By: az_mommma - 8/28/2007
 
my son had mental disabilities and mental diorders...i had trouble with him since he was 6yrs.old but he was a straight a student and graduated...your problems are worse cause he is threatening the other kids and yes he could be dangerous.hes a delinquent and you need to find help for him before he does something...... More
Answered By: mary g - 8/28/2007
 
You need to talk to him and and counsellor together. Autism is very complicated and he probably feels like a looser if his other siblings are different. You need to find out where did yout go wrong maybe spoilt him too much , cos he has a disability and did not set the boundaries early on. And it is hard when he has... More
Answered By: Lindsay - 8/28/2007
 
My heart goes out to you. I can't speak from experience but I know several really good people in your situation... More
Answered By: annie - 8/28/2007
 
G'day. There really should be a place for people like this. There is nothing you can do until he wakes up to himself, and that depends on his personality. As soon as he is old enough, get him a job and cut him loose. Protect the rest of your family. There is nothing you can do for him until he is ready to admit he is... More
Answered By: tredbruce138 - 8/28/2007
 
just keep hoping because you cant give up on your kids put him in a juvenile detention center or some correctional facility you can straighten him out some way
Answered By: Miss NeNe - 8/28/2007
 
My advice is to start praying for him. Ask God to allow you to see him the way HE does. I know how it feels to love your child, but to not always like them. I have a sixteen year old too. Prayer helps a lot, also, I would suggest finding a counselor or a Psychologist to help him deal with his anger.
Answered By: KIMMY - 8/28/2007
 
Try boading School or milatary school.
Answered By: K S - 8/28/2007
 
Don't worry....I hate crazy people too.
Answered By: Aleema D - 8/28/2007
 
You are a good mommy My Papa ince told me He loved me but didn't like all that I did I now tell that to my ladys. it is true love is always there but we all know they do things we hate
Answered By: Marvelgirl - 8/28/2007
 
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