| How many men lie about being raped and physically abused?A number of posters here tonight have claimed that the figure of 'false r**e' claims is as high as 90 per cent, so that must mean 90 per cent of male r**e victims lie too, mustn't it?
And other posters continually claim that the level of physical abuse claims is way overstated, so that must mean men are lying about this as well.
I find it shocking!
Is there a social epidemic where everyone is lying about this stuff? What a terrible social tragedy, if so.
Asked By: thing 55001 - 3/31/2008 |
I have never lied about either.
I have never met a man who claimed to have been raped by a woman.
I was physically abused by an ex-spouse, but I never reported the abuse for various reasons which i do not care to revisit. I suppose some people would see my failure to prosecute her as a kind of lie. In case you are wondering, I never hit back, and I never physically harmed her in any way.
I have been reading through some of the r**e questions here on YA today, and I have only to add the following comments.
I have known several women who were raped or sexually assaulted and never known anybody who has made a false accusation. Of those who I have known who have been raped, I do not doubt for a second that they actually had the experiences they have discussed with me. The physical and psychological traumas would be shockng to anybody who has not endured something similar, and the wounds sometimes neve heal. In addition, there is a social stigma associated with r**e victims which supercedes police interrogation, and other more immediate matters. Many women also do not believe they will be believed or think that they might be accused of causing the violence that has been committed upon them. What all of this adds up to, among my friends, is that despite diplomatic and compassionate urging, only 3/4ths of the raped or assaulted people I have known ever reported what happened to them. And all of them - not just the reporters - ARE STRONG, COURAGEOUS, SELF-CONFIDENT WOMEN.
None of those who reported were ever accused of lying about it, and, as far as I know, the police investigations were conducted earnestly and in good faith. Only one resulted in a conviction, but, in the other cases, the assailant could not be identified or, in one case, the woman's ex-boyfriend had died before the investigators found him.
I do not, on the basis of this, believe that false accusations do not take place, but I tend to doubt the higher estimates that i have seen here on YA.
I only know what I have been exposed to by people I trust. what I believe about the statistics presented here by various people is guided by that knowledge more than anything else.
What bothers me about what I have seen here on YA is not the bickering about statistics, etc - stats regarding social and criminal issues will always be problematic because these issues are dependant on non-scientific variables such as how somebody defines r**e and what constitutes a false accusation.
What bothers me is the attitude that I have seen among some answerers which suggests that this is not a problem, that the problem is not important, and/or that they don't care.
IF THIS IS THE CASE, THEN THERE IS A SIMPLE SOLUTION - DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME RESPONDING, and leave the issue up to those of us who do care.
Yes, false accusers should be punished. Yes rapists should be punished. Yes, those falsely accused should be compensate for their troubles. And yes, we should do everything we can to allow victims to feel as if they can trust the police to do their jobs without passing judgment on the victims themselves.
I don't have any easy solutions to all of this. However, I think the only effective solutions must come from grass-roots, heartfelt interpersonal efforts, not necessarily governmental policy. Law, support-groups, better and stronger friendships, sympathetic and/or female police officers or matrons, etc etc, can help treat the symptoms, but not the cause. The CAUSE is what should be focused on - not the symptoms. This is a society-wide problem and it sickens me that some people are so dismissive of it.
Answered By: Earwax Of Satan - 3/31/2008 |