am i good at writing?
hello i am new to writing storys but i only want to do it if im good here part of my first one its not long but i think its good what do you guys think, im not going to make this one much longer but if you guys like it im going to write a novel alot longer one around 250 pages Larger than Earth, the ship called the Metal-City the ship, is the first city-ship, a city that is a giant spacecraft. All of it's eighty thousand citizens are on board. The ship is made from a metal called Urantitverium, the hardest substance ever created, an alloy of uranium, titanium, silver and plutonium. Urantitverium is colored purple so the ship does not need painted, Urantitverium is also one of the lightest metals. The Metal-City, can go to speeds of seven hundred space miles an hour, one space mile is around twenty-four light-years. The fastest ship ever created except for the war ship called The Barbarian. The ship is greatly larger than earth but only carries eighty thousand people as it is heading from Jupiter, to the planet Deminis a planet which is filled with many people and is running out of space. The mission for Metal-City is to take many people and fill its living quarters with Deminian. After the ships living quarters is filled it will search for a new planet with a livable atmosphere and transport vital resources for the Deminians to build colonies on the new planet. The ship for it's size is extreamly easy to maneuver in space, the only flaw is that if an asteroid belt is near the ship has to go around it, it is so large it can not go straight through. The ships technology is far advanced to other ships, it has the technology to transport people to other regions of the ship, it even has the technology to create holograms of people, that have never lived, the holograms are just like real people but do all the difficult work, the holograms teach in the schools, they clean the ship, they repair the robots, they do all the work nobody wants to do. In the ship people work in many doing hundreds of different jobs, such as designing new technology's in the lab, navigating the ship and one of the most important jobs is keeping the hologramatic server working, The hologramatic server is a computer that makes sure the holograms are working and that they don't commit mutiny. Some people work alongside the holograms, there are currently twelve thousand different holograms all with their own personality and each with their own unique strengths and weaknesses. The Metal-City started being built in the year 2067 and was finished in the year 2390. It took many years and many millions of Seed, Seed is the universal currency released in 2045. The ship has many defenses such as force field, a field that protects the ship from almost anything. The ship has lasers that can melt chemicals that have melting points so high that they have never before been seen in liquid state. The ship also has a system for stealing information from other ships which is vital in defense against more advanced ships. If the ship is in a lot of trouble smaller ships called eagles can be released, the eagles have strong lasers and can move at speeds that make the Metal-City look small. The Eagles are not just used for fighting they are also used for scouting in areas that are uncharted or where star-pirates may be hiding. There are twenty Eagles, each of them run by a hologram so no human life may be lost if a crash happens. The Eagles have rarely been used for fighting, mostly for when a rogue asteroid is heading for the ship and the ship would not be able to move fast enough. The ship has many entertainments features on ship such as cinema, bars and many other recreational elements. The ship has many doctors and nurses all very well educated. The doctors and nurses are not just people but also holograms who have an extra brain chip in their hologramatic file. The ship is slowly making its journey to Deminis, it is now heading through a dark sunless area of space, this area is known for star-pirates. “Navigation Commander Tyra, why have you taken us into this part of space, we are no where near Deminis?” Shouted Captain Davis, Captain Davis is the Captain of Metal-City and has the highest authority on board the ship. “Because Capitan Davis, we are not heading to Deminis anymore i am taking control of the ship!” said Navigation Commander Tyra. After that was said Tyra took out a knife and stabbed the Captain in the neck, he was dead. Tyra then said to everyone over the loudspeaker. “I have found the Captain dead, as the second person with the second highest authority on the ship i will be taking place as Captain, and i have some new people coming on board the ship, they are in this sector you will treat them like you treat everyone else here!” Commanded Tyra A group of friends are in the prison area of the ship, they are not prisoners, they are hiding as they do not work on the ship. The group of friends is one hologram wh can you explian infodump a bit more and do you think i should take some writing classes
Asked By: Ccc - 3/29/2010
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
What you have done is summarized. You have pretty much written out in "laundry list" format what the ship is and what it does for about three to four paragraphs. It is in essence an info dump and no reader likes them even when they are done with finesse (which this is not... More
Answered By: sensualgruv - 3/29/2010
Additional Answers (3)
You can't expect to be a brilliant writer when you first start. Like playing the piano, it takes time and work and practice and experience and devotion. But if you apply yourself and keep working on it, you can get better and better.
Answered By: RunningBear - 3/29/2010
You infodump alot, ie give us backstory. You don't need that. :) Keep at it. Try to 'show' us the story, not 'tell' it. In a few years, you'll be a great writer. I see raw talent in this. You just need to get some experience in. :)
Answered By: likestorunincircles - 3/29/2010
It was a good try for a first time writer. As a writer myself (unpublished right now) I remember what it was like when I first started writing it was awkward and a little undone. It is that way with everything new. I am still learning by doing. You shouldn't say that if no one likes what you write you won't do it... More
Answered By: Cass 4 ever - 3/30/2010
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