Girlfriend Moving In- I Have Problems?
My girlfriend and I have been together around a year and a half now, it will be 2 years this fall. I am currently attending a major university far from home; she is from my hometown and is currently living with her family. We have made it a year and a half long distance (650 miles) but have recently been saving up to move in together. However... She had to have surgery her high school senior year and missed a lot of a semester. Instead of being behind she went to home schooll. However she has been "home schooled" for a few years now, she is 19 now, will be halfway to 20 when she moves in. It stresses her out a lot not being finished, as it does me too. I told her I wanted it done this semester (as I have every semester now) and it doesn't look as if she will be much closer than 1 class by the end of the semester. I really wanted her to be done by the time she moves up. It gets tricky... We have been planning this out for some time now. She and I have both been working very hard the last 2 semesters and saving every penny. We have gone to a family financial advisor for budgeting help, ect. We are on track and almost have the money the financial advisor said we need to have to be safe. However, with her STILL not finished with her high school stuff, I don't feel good about it. Also, she has TONS of anxiety about working with people (as in real jobs, high speed jobs, stressful situations, ect). She says she really can't even handle being a cashier somewhere because its too hard and she can't do the math. When she even goes to the bank she gets too much anxiety to even deposit her checks into the right accounts (checking and saving). She really cannot even do the math (using a calculator too) to know how much to put into each account. She just gets to stressed and has to cash her entire check then come back in multiple trips to deposit it. I am going to school and will be graduated in roughly a year and a semester or so with my degree in business management. I plan on opening my own business. She can't handle being a cashier, and won't finish her high school. I have not told my family about our plans to move in together in the fall (I plan on telling them spring break in 2 weeks when I am down). She has told her entire family and they all support her and are helping her plan and giving her stuff for our place. She has been working and saving up a lot of money and making sacrifices to be able to move up here, but because of her school and I just worry she won't be successful due to her "anxiety". Anyways, what should I do? How do I tell her now I'm not sure she should move in in the fall because of all of this? Should I break up with her? I love her with all of my heart and we have so many wonderful memories and such a happy relationship, I just feel she may hold me back one day because of her "anxiety" and really not being able to complete simple tasks or handle situations.
Asked By: Max Blaise - 3/1/2011
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
Tough question as you are dealing with your lives and are making life decisions. The bottom line is are you reminiscing on the past and you are harboring the past as a benchmark for the future or what it may deliver or have you had a serious shot of reality and that is that your partner may not have the skills to cope... More
Answered By: Sage - 3/1/2011
Additional Answers (3)
yeah, its going to be difficult. in the best case scenario, you will end up living and probably marrying a girl who will be a housewife without a job. the worst case scenario, she will have a nervous breakdown because she never learned to live on her own because she was so sheltered... More
Answered By: Emotionally Yours - 3/1/2011
You are thinking this thing into destruction. You never know what tomorrow will bring. My gawd man if you love this woman that much, enjoy her and you together and your spot in life. Either one of you could be gone tomorrow and look at all you would have missed. If you think you have control over your life, just wait... More
Answered By: Aqua 7 - 3/1/2011
Is she a "Special Needs" Person? I mean really, she can't finish High School and you getting a degree in Business Management. Wake up...if your really thinking about starting up your own Co. Then just what is it that she'll be doing? Sitting home looking cute? In today's world, it will take the both of you to even... More
Answered By: Allan Wilkins - 3/1/2011
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