Well, aside from the family problem itself, I can't really argue with my parents well.
They said "whats the point of graduating from U.S. and then going to Korea? You can't get any job, because the whole tradition will be different, and you'll speak Korean like a white guy, if you decide to live in U.S. for 4 more years. Plus, if you go to crappy colleges like UC Riverside, you'll live with crappy guys who have heavy accents, with crappy professors, and I don't want you to be a bad guy when you grow up. If you got accepted to UCLA, that's another story."
Me: "I don't really care. I really want to go to U.S. college, even IVC, because I believe that's the best for me."
Parents: "It's not. Do you want to be stuck in jail (IVC, not literally jail) for 4 more years, looking at paper all day, or do you want to go to Korea, and have fun, and not study much, and get a job with 100?uarantee?"
Me: "There is no such thing as guarantee. Your just trying to convince me. I'll try to study really hard and get into UCLA"
Parents: "Do you really want to study all day at IVC (community college name) and go to UCLA, and study all day there too, and compete with hundreds of smart people? Do you really think you can manage all that? Dirty dorms. Friends throwing parties? Drinking alchols? Plus, do you know how hard it is these days in U.S.? you can't get a job, because your competing against white people in US and they always have more benefit than you."
Me: "But there's restrictions in Korea. Handong only has weird subjects like Korean studies, and It's just not right for me. Yonsei is way too competitive, Korea is nearly impossible to get in or any of them. Plus, it's hard to become a teacher."
Parents: "It might be hard to become a teacher, but there'll always be positions for you. Think about it. Theres 10000's of schools in Korea. Do you really think you can't get a teaching position in the school, if you graduate from top 50 in south korea, like Handong, Yonsei, etc? Plus, you can still get a teachers license, even if you take sociology, filming, med, whatever you want. The test is probably easy anyway."
Me: "First of all, no, it's not easy. Second of all, filming has nothing to do with school teaching."
Parents: :"Okay. Fine! Whatever? You make the decision. I don't care if you die in the dorm. if you go car crash. go drink alchol and get paid 3 dollars an hour. BUT, I know if you graduate from U.S., and work in U.S. you'll probably get paid 20 dollars an hour, work all day, and barely live with no fun and joy, like Korea."
Me: "I told you! I'm going to transfer to Korea AFTER i graduate."
Parents: "You can't do anything in Korea if you transfer. Transferring is difficult, and if you come to Korea, you'll lose the tradition, and not only that, but you'll only work in 확원 all day. No public school teaching. No more psychologist. No more nothing.
Me: "I really don't know what's best for me... I'm really confused..."
Parents: "I'd definitely let you stay IF you went to UCLA, but I can't let you go to crappy school, and get no job in U.S. If you go to IVC, it's just going to be more complicated.. Studying all day with several dumb friends, and doing nothing. I'm just doing what's best for you.. You're fluent in English so if you go to Korea, you'll have the advantage too!"
Me: "NOOO, YOUR COMPLETELY MISUNDERSTANDING"
Parents: "Don't think too much.. You'll see how perfect Korea is.."
Me: "Then, what job can i get if i go to Korea.."
Parents: "Teacher is the easiest job, out of all the possibility. I'm not saying you should be a teacher. You always have a path, because your dad is rich, and he can support you in anything without a single financial service. But, you should make a good decision."
Me: "I really don't know what to do. I feel like I'm in the middle trapped.. I can't go to Korea, because of the competitiveness... I can't go to U.S. because you won't let me, and because I personally don't want to study all day."
Parents: "Just go to Korea. Don't be in the middle, and choose. I mean..I won't force you to. I'm only saying that going to Korea will give you a thousand times more benefit than U.S. especially for you, who can surpass other Koreans, who dream of coming to Handong University or 외대학교."
Me: "What should i do.. What should i do... What should i do..."
This is my situation, and this is why I'm asking you many times,, because i can't think of a solution.
Asked By: Coolguy11 - 6/11/2011
Wow, you've got more of a problem that I thought...I really mean no offense, but your parents' mentality is stuck back in the 80's and 90's. Most of the things that they say might have been true up to the 90's, but it is literally not the case today. You being fluent in English cannot be considered as an advantage anymore. There are SO many Koreans that are fluent today that English is just a given. But more importantly, if you've got a strong Korean accent and can only maintain a basic conversation, even the slight advantage you may have is gone. If you've got a strong Korean accent now, it will essentially never go away. There are many people like myself that are just as fluent in Korean as they are in English. No one knows that I am from the states. Even so, I don't really consider it as an advantage myself. I've got friends who are trilingual and quadlingual (if that's a word). Now they are a different story.
They clearly have some sort of weird misconception about schools in the states. Their assumptions of the states is clearly based on nothing. Just because a school is a community college doesn't mean it's dangerous and filled with low lives. Sure you're likely to find more people who like to party at the lower schools, but that's the same anywhere in the world. You're likely to drink more in Korea than you do in the states so long as you stay away from frat parties. So long as you choose to hang out with the right crowd, it doesn't matter where you are. As for working, they've got it completely wrong. You get paid jack shit in Korea to work throughout the night without any overtime pay. In the states you work 9-5 and get paid much more than you would in Korea, plus with the added benefit of overtime pay and health care.
I'm really curious to what they are basing their assumptions on employment in Korea are. You should ask. First, a top 50 school doesn't mean much when there are only 130ish schools in the entire country. There aren't even 50 in Seoul. Top 50 means something over here in the states as there are 2000+ universities. If they did a little bit of research for themselves, they will soon realize that becoming a teacher isn't easy at all. Aside from the fact that there aren't many colleges of education you can get into, you'd essentially have to be the top of your class. Sure there's tons of schools out there, but there's much more that want to become teachers as it's a highly respectable and safe career choice. If you take the exam for the license, I don't understand why they assume it will be easy. Perhaps they are underestimating teachers and believe that anyone can become one. I can assure you that that is certainly not the case.
Being fluent in English doesn't actually give you much of an advantage as an English teacher as you may think. An English teacher doesn't need to be able to speak like a native. I personally think it's more of a disadvantage. A Korean English teacher would have just as much knowledge in the language (grammar, vocab) and to add to that, they have studied English exactly the way they need to teach it. People like us simply take all the grammar rules for granted. We know when something is wrong, but most of the time can't exactly explain why. Koreans on the other hand can as they have learned the grammar by rules, which is what you need to be able to teach.
If they can somehow get you into a top school with a hefty donation (which is illegal) and line you up with a job upon graduation, then by all means go for it. But if it's ultimately up to you, go to school in the states. Any UC school is better than a school in a 시골 in Korea. You can look for a job in the states and start a life here or always go back. White people DON'T have an advantage because they're white. You should seriously ask your parents where they are getting all this information from because the way I see it, they're basing everything they're telling you on assumptions that may be been true decades ago. A US diploma won't make it easy to get a job in Korea, but it's hard enough as it is that it really doesn't matter. At this point, I think the most important thing to do is to figure out what you want to do as it can make a very big difference on which path is clearly the better choice. (Ie. If you want to become a Korean teacher, you'd obviously have to study in the states. If you want to work in Hotel management, you can do just as well with a US diploma etc.)
To sum it up, almost everything your parents are claiming is false. If they continue to deny without doing any solid research, then honestly you're better off starting your own life in the states for the time being.
Answered By: Steven Ham - 6/12/2011