Should I feel guilty for hiring a part time nanny if I am a SAHM?
I've been going back and forth on our family decision to hire part time help for me. My husband works overseas and is easily gone 8 months out of the year. He is usually in Africa or Singapore, he's a Riser Supervisor and oversees the building and fixing of oil rigs. I am a SAHM with a 7 year old and a precious 8 week old. My husband just left again for work and will be gone for 6 weeks. I am 100% alone with the kids. We decided to hire someone to come over 2 times a week for 5 hrs each time to help out since the laundry is piling up (I wash but never seem to have enough time to fold it and put it away), the bathrooms are getting a little gross (nothing to bad but I miss that blue water) and the dog we have is definitely p****d at me for not taking her to the groomers lately. Our 8 week old is still not sleeping though the night, I am sleep deprived, going a little mad being couped up in the house all day and my oldest child is a little jealous all my free time is with the new baby or trying to clean, cook. grocery shop, pay bills or trying to communicate with husband to make sure hes still alive (another feat in itself). On top of that, for health reasons, I still need to find time to go to the gym to lose weight (PCOS, High blood pressure - google it if you don't know and if you have it I feel your pain). Hell I just want a shower!!! So he told me hire someone....I feel like I am failing here. Is it wrong that I need help when this is all I have to do is take care of the house and kids(maybe myself too)? Would you hire someone if you could? I do miss my clean house, a full pantry, and spending time with my son, hell even a nap would be nice. Should I feel guilty?? Oh thank goodness I got positive feedback. I would have cried otherwise (not sure if its the lack of sleep or hormones that are making me this way). I just am so alone and my family works 24/7 and can't really help and we just moved to the area so no friends here yet. I have boxes all over my house. FYI, don't move the week before your delivery date, you'll never unpack. THANK YOU GUYS! Now off to get this spit up off my hair!
Asked By: Coneja - 1/30/2013
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
Don't feel guilty at all! I know exactly how you feel as I have 4 kids, and my husbands job has him gone like that. You are all you kids have right now, you need to be healthy, physically and emotionally in order to take care of them. When your husband is home you get a brake, so you're hiring someone to give you... More
Answered By: Kyra - 1/30/2013
Additional Answers (5)
No, you shouldn't feel guilty. A newborn is a full time job. I was thrilled if I could get a shower and a load of laundry done both on the same day. If you have no backup, then hiring someone for a few hours is a good solution. I had my mom to come and help me, and I had a husband who was around at least some of the... More
Answered By: D - 1/30/2013
If you can afford it, I say go for it.
Answered By: Exit 117 - 1/30/2013
If your husband worked a normal local job just gone out of the house 8 hrs a day I would think your hiring someone would be rediculous, but while he is away there is no reason why you should not have a bit of help. You can use some of the hours to spend on yourself just to get a break and you can use some to spend with... More
Answered By: alicialions - 1/30/2013
hey. you don't need anybody's blessing or permission to do what it takes to make your life and your kids' life calmer and more manageable. guilt is for when you're harming someone, not for when you're taking steps to help your family work better... More
Answered By: desmeran - 1/30/2013
So hire someone. And get that 7-year-old of yours to help out some. No reason she can't do some dishes, clean the bathroom (at least the one she uses), keep her room clean and bed made, and fold some laundry even. It teaches her responsibility and gives her a sense of ownership, which increases her self esteem. She... More
Answered By: royalbird - 1/30/2013
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